Art of Moving on...

Moving on seems so difficult. When you are advised by a friend to move on, it is like asking you to forget what happened...

There are moments in life, usually down and depressing times, when we have to make choices of giving up or fighting more. In a relationship where you do not know the real score, whether the two of you still have that connection or the tie is about to give up, it is not easy to decide. You still love him but you do not even know if he still loves you. It is harder if he left you because he found someone new, better than you. The more you think of it, the more painful it becomes. You can not concentrate in your studies because you want to ask what went wrong or what have you done to make him look for another. Or maybe, you will ask if he did really love you, because if he did, he would not have loved someone else.

We are just human beings, capable of committing mistakes. Maybe things are just meant to be, he was not really for you and you deserve someone else, maybe even better than him. Now, the choice is yours, it is either you move on or move on.

Don't get me wrong, it is a fact that you have no other choice. Life is like a movie but life can never be turned back. You can not step backward, mistakes can never be undo but you can correct your mistakes in other ways. They say that you have to let go of the past but is there really such thing as letting go? Maybe yes, you have to learn to let him go. Don't hold him back or don't hold on to a failed relationship because you will only suffer. Who knows, God has His own reasons for letting things happen.

Moving on sounds so plain and simple but the truth is...it is far beyond what you expect. You know, it is not that easy when you are not there or when you have been there before and now, you can't still handle it. How can you move on if you can always see his picture in your wallet or in your room? Perhaps you can remove the things that remind you of him. How can you move on when you still remember him if you eat at your favorite store or when you do the things you used to do with him? Maybe you can avoid those things. How can you move on if you can see him smiling and fine when you are bleeding and suffering? How can you ever face reality when it still hurts and the pain is just hard to forget.

The answers are acceptance and forgiveness. There are so many blessings in life that we have to be thankful and one of these is the experience. Experience is the best teacher, even how painful and harsh it may seem but it teaches us many lessons in life. It reminds us that we should learn from our mistakes. We have to accept that some things are not just for us. We have to face the challenges and wake up to a bright new day. You can not hide and avoid your fears forever, bravery is always a requirement. Moreover, you have to forgive him for hurting you and for leaving you not way you wanted. But you also have to forgive yourself for committing mistakes. It was not a mistake to love him and you should not regret that you have met him because at that time, it was all you ever wanted. He just served as a lesson for you.

Someday, when wounds are healed and tears are wiped away, you will smile when you remember him. You will laugh at how you act when he left you. You will think it was too childish to cry over. Someday, you will love yourself more and be thankful that once or many times in your life, you experience to love, get hurt and move on...

Murmurs from the heart...

It is difficult to be away from home... It just means being away from the unending yet sweet words of my mom, the hard-to-understand commands of my dad, the annoying but cute grumbling of my dear brother, and of course, the almost everyday fights with my guy which usually ends with hugs and forgiveness... Just how sad to be away...

I am currently studying in this prestigious university where bright minds meet and struggle for the sweet mental torture and to attain survival. Graduates from this university are well known experts and land for high paying jobs. Though the process is really difficult yet the fruits it will bear are fulfilling and remarkable.

Being away from home also brings a lot of responsibilities. The decisions that you will make can either make or break. Sometimes, it is not easy to decide by your self, you might not know that you are already digging your own grave. There a lot of temptations coming along the way, the twist there is how are you going to make it despite all the odds and whatever have gone through your way.

Sometimes I can observe that some people are intelligent yet they lack the diligence in studying but there are also students who already did all the research and studying yet they still failed the subject. There are also times wherein luck is just too kind to students who even did not study yet they still manage to be in the top. Well, as they say, in this university, it does not matter who is in the top or who studied a lot, the more important is, who stand amongst all at the end of the line, the ones who survive and smile after going through all those hardships...

Indeed, it is not easy to be away from home and to study in this university. Yet I know someday, everything will pay off. Good luck for me.

Talking to Myself

There are things that you thought would happen to you anytime, your are kinda sure about it but you are not really prepared on what you will do. Expectations and hopes can just result to disappointment and depression. Dreams and aspirations are all part of our lives, you have to dream, set your goal, do your best to make it happen and ask God for guidance. Sometimes, failure happens but you still have to stand up from where you fell down and wipe away your tears...facing your fears and cruising through life's struggles are more fulfilling than just sitting there and wait for miracles to happen. They say that you will not be disappointed if you will never hope. Yet how would you know that you have reached success if you never dream? After all, trying and failing are not bad, there is still a bright tomorrow waiting for you. I am saying this to convince myself, it is not easy to listen to your own advice but other's will not understand me, how could they advise me?

Piece of Chocolate

Yesterday, my room mate gave me chocolate cookies. The box says it's called addiction and by the name itself you will be addicted right after your first bite. Unfortunately, I was not amazed after my first bite. It was only after I finished a whole piece that I realized how fantastic it was. The sweetness and bitterness of the cocoa blends well that you might forget you are eating a cookie. Try it to believe it...

Sometimes or most of the times, a piece of chocolate can be my addiction, comforter, or friend. After taking a very difficult exam which can make me cry, I usually look for any chocolate. It will be better if I will find chocolate sundae or chocolate cake. But I prefer the cheaper one. It comforts me with its delicious taste. When I am happy and I want to celebrate, I tend to look for a chocolate again but the more expensive one. Death By Chocolate is the cake you will surely love other than Black Forrest.

Every time I am in a grocery store, I usually choose chocolate milk over the plain milk, the chocolate biscuits rather than the vanilla flavored and the chocolate chips instead of cheese-flavored chips. Even though my mother tells me from time immemorial that too much chocolate can cause toothache, I am still fond of it. I love it indeed.

Each piece of chocolate reminds me that life can still be sweet and tasty in spite of the bitter things happening to me. The darker the chocolate, the more bitter it is. Yet its delicious taste is beneath every bitterness you taste. Have some chocolate and feel the taste of life!

Away!

Summer classes are soon to be over. My friend has already bought for her ticket going home. My other friends are already excited while I am not happy at all. My roommate has packed her things this morning and seeing her only adds to my loneliness. This will be my first time not going home for this summer vacation. I do not know how will I spend the coming days, I just hope I will still enjoy no matter what.

Being away from my family is not a big deal anymore since I have been here for three years. The fact that I can not go home is not a problem if I will not think about it. Time flies so fast... Life is like that...things are just meant to happen even how you try to prevent them...

With You...

I'm into you,
And boy,
No one else would do,
'cause with every kiss and every hug,
You make me fall in love,
And now I know I can't be the only one,
I bet there heart's all over the world tonight,
With the love of they life who feel..
Wat I feel when I'm

With you...

Best Friend

Anyone can have lots of friends... different or similar friends. Sometimes, distance may be a reason to separate us from them yet time also helps to build friendship again. Though I have many friends, I still long for one thing. One thing that you may think it sounds so simple yet for me, it is not. I envy other people who have lifetime best friends. I mean, they have this best friend who has been with them all their life and they have shared so many memories even they are sometimes away from each other. So many close friends have come in my life yet I still want someone to call mine...someone to call best or bessy... I have best friends but they are not only mine, they are also their's. I want to experience that feeling of running into that someone after a painful heartache or in a depressing problem or to share my overflowing happiness. These things can be done with a boyfriend or with my mom or with my brother yet the feeling is different. I am happy with my friends but I still need that thing...

Being The Shorter One

Sometimes you want to blame genetics for what you look like and how you act but still you can not because science has also its own ways of modifying the creation of genetics. Nowadays, many are open to surgery, liposuction, and the like which can alter the body parts and make anyone look more beautiful or weigh less. Also, there are vitamins and food supplements which can help you like tea for making a fat lady thin and sexy, or vitamin B 6,12 which is for growth and I have known a few people who attested to the effectiveness of this one.

Some friends describe me as petite and I can not deny my height. Though I know that vitamins do exist and they can help increase my height, still I did not go for those. I did not know why... When I was in elementary, my height was the average one but it all started in high school when I realized I was not growing any few inches anymore and I should accept that fact. Just a month ago, I was talking to a new friend and I told her I am a college student. She was surprised to learn that I am a senior student and she thought I am still a freshman due to my height.

I am almost five feet and I got this height from my mom. I hope that my brother will be tall, not like me. Just this morning, I was with my classmate and we used my umbrella because it was hot. Since she is taller that me, she was the one holding it. In getting something from the cabinet, I have to use the chair so I can get it. I also fold the end of my pants because they are too long.

See? There are two sides in being the shorter one. Those are just few of the many things but if you ask me, I am still glad I am me and I am contented with it. Thank God for giving me a complete body and I am truly blessed!

Staying in a Dormitory

My university is truly far from our place. While most of my classmates and friends can go home during weekends, we are just left in the dormitory or sometimes hanging around the campus. I stayed in an apartment for one semester and I did not try it again. There is a big difference in the apartment and in the dormitory, especially the living expenses, house rental, electricity and water bill, and house maintenance expenses. We are not rich and so I rather stay in the dormitory until I will graduate from my course.

A dormitory owned by the university is cheaper than the private dormitories. But the cheap price has its own consequences. Electricity and water supply is not always available. Water supply is from five in the morning up to eight in the evening. If you planned to go back late in the evening, you better save a pale of water for yourself before you leave. Typhoons and bad weather occur often and when these occur, electricity will be unavailable with or without prior notice for how many hours or days, and sometimes even the water supply. I have experienced the nights where we have to study for exams and we have no other choice except to use candles. The generator can not accommodate all the rooms. As always, these are the things that most freshmen complain with regards to our dormitories and so others will transfer to apartments or dormitories outside the campus.

But for us who can not afford living outside, we still choose to stay here. Our payment for one semester here is equal or less than their payment there for a month excluding the electricity and water bill. Safety is always assured inside the campus, I just do not know if the same goes outside. I also work as a student assistant in our dormitory, which is exclusive for women, and I can work more here than in other offices.

As you can see, there are more good things than the not-so-good things brought to us by staying in a dormitory owned by the university. That is why many still choose to stay here even those who can afford staying outside.

Accepting and Loving

Sometimes, we are in a crossroad of loving someone whom you can not accept a part of his life. Our parents manifest the unselfish love for us that despite our mistakes, they still accept us. In friendship, we love our friends though we can not understand some of their principles. As long as we love the person, we are willing to accept the bad along with the good. There are cases when the guy is in love with a single mother and we can not deny the fact that not all men are willing to take care the child and wife of another man. Also, we often say that we accept his whole being but we can not erase in our mind what he has done or what has happened to him before. In relationships, it is not enough that you accept him of what he is, you should also accept him of what he is not. We can not expect him to be the person that you want him to be because that is not anymore him.

Friendship

Sometimes, we just love our friends so much that we do not even care whether they feel the same way too. There are also cases wherein we are too callous not to feel that we have hurt a friend and our words are more than enough to break friendship. Breakups are normal in boy-girl relationship, petty tiffs are also normal to any relationship. But... are breakups also normal in a friendship?

Have you ever felt it when all along you thought they were your friends only to find out that they were just using you? In a novelty song, it has been said that the so-called friends are just there when you have the money they needed. They will leave you when you have nothing. In times like this, it is hard to trust those type of friends anymore. The friendship can be revived but not the closeness, there is that gap called uncertainty.

We have lots of friends but only few are true and are willing to be there for you in your worst moments. We can not choose who we knew but we can always choose who we will get along with... Take care of your precious friends and cherish the friendship.

Survival of the fittest

Here in the university, every student is being tested in a ring of fire. No one escapes from experiencing the torture, specifically mind torture, and it depends upon that student on how he or she will handle everything until the end of the semester. When June comes, you can still hang out with your friends without worrying exams and papers. But when August is on the way, be prepared to feel the so-called 'hell weeks' where anyone will be stressed and depressed.

It was my first year in college and I was not used to the weather here. It was August and you could not understand the inconsistent weather that time. Due to the low relative humidity of the place and the trees around, I became sick and it was pneumonia. After a week of exams, I went to the university health service for a check-up and the doctor required me to stay there for medication. My friend accompanied me and she left to get some clothes at out dormitory. She did not come back, I just learned she got fever. Another sad thing, I sent my phone to my mother a week before that because it was not functioning well. So I could not contact my family and friends. My only visitor was my dorm mate. After two days, I was fine.

It was my first and last serious sickness. Now, three years had passed and thank God that I am still fine despite all odds. Last week, I had to absent from my class because of my fever. This week has been so stressful and depressing for me. My performance is not good and I blame myself for being lazy sometimes.

Exams and requirements are always there. The challenge is, how will you survive? It is just a matter of time and management. Time lost is lost forever. I just hope I can advice myself more than this.

The Gift

Whenever you think that the world is so unfair and all the misfortunes are in you, think again and look around. Maybe you will say that you are the unluckiest person for that day because you experienced so many bad things but you may not notice how God works in mysterious ways. You may not realize that there are still people out there, both poor and alone, who face bigger problems than yours but still they trust to the Lord their fate. We often neglect the fact that God will not leave us empty handed. Reflect this over and be thankful that despite all the odds, you are still alive. Life is a borrowed gift, appreciate it while you still have it.

Love Life!

Each day is a wonderful gift given to us. We are given opportunities and take experiences which will make us better individuals. We may encounter nice days which will make us smile. Yet, there are also times that we can not even laugh and just be teary-eyed. Sadly, depression makes us very vulnerable beings.
When problems just pour down on our lives, we may think of ways on how to overcome these situations. But for those who were defeated, they take the most regrettable escape, SUICIDE. These people tend to hide their feelings of being down because of their own reasons, some just want to show off and some are just afraid. Can we blame them? They are indeed troubled and could not think rationally. Undoubtedly, they need help.
Sharing your problems and talking to significant persons lessen the burdens that you carry. You are relieved of the fact that in the battle that you undertake, these chums will definitely render their company and support. Resorting to professionals who can expertly handle such circumstances is also a good option to take.
Surely, you can find answers to each difficulty that arises. Each time darkness comes, light follows. God never gives us problems that we can’t deal with. That is why He bestowed us with tomorrows. Love life!

String of Heart

Love is so simple yet very complicated. Loving someone is more complicated. The art of loving a person can not be described in a single phrase or thousand of words but the heart of that person only knows thing, to beat. In every kind of feeling, the heart has its own way of talking. When you are in pain, you will know that the heart is bleeding because of the constrictions it does and it makes you cry, tears from the eyes or from the inside. It is like how they describe in poems, it feels like your heart is being torn into pieces. The moment you cry, shout or burst out the pain through words or actions, you ease the burden in your heart and the pain is slowly fading, so slowly that you do not even know when it will totally fade. Maybe that is why heartbeats are just three ways, one is normal, two is fast like when you feel an extreme emotion, and three is… it does not beat anymore.

They say that we should take care of our heart. Love wisely and carefully. However, it is always easier said than done. They advised you to take good care of your heart because they have been there and they can not advise themselves. At first, it is usually sweet and wonderful with the notion that they say, if time can only be stopped there and then or wishing that they will not wake up from that exquisite dream. Time will pass and tears will fall…tears of happiness, confusion, enjoyment, and sadness. You may tend to blame your heart for loving the wrong way or the wrong person yet you do not even understand that the heart only knows how to beat, it does not even choose the situation for you.

Despite everything, we as human still continue to love and fly again. Surf through the vast ocean of love. Our hearts are very important. In our happiest and saddest moments, these have felt it all… Again, take good care of your heart and express what you feel, do not hide it inside for you will never know when it will be full and it will definitely burst. You only have one heart so treasure it.

Love your heart.